Brian McLane

Media and Social Commentary

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PREPARING FOR THE BRUTES – MY TRIP TO BALLYS

May 29th, 2013 · No Comments · Social Commentary

Preparing for the brutes

I went to Ballys to check out the gym on a 7 day free pass.

I need it. All the Georgian food is really doing me in. I don’t think the occassional Nutty Buddy late at night is making that much of an impact. True May has been a month that saw 4 or 5 causes for celebration; my wife’s birthday, mother’s day, our anniversary, we went to a party on the Island to some friends we hadn’t seen in years, house warming party… one or two others.

So I’m back to revisiting going to the gym even though I always start with the best of intentions and then quickly fall off with never having the time to go.

So I wWent to one of their classes right away called Guerilla training. The class was packed and I got to it somewhere in the middle, standing by, watching. It’s fast paced cardio and mixed martial arts moves to ultra up tempo techno and house music.

Went downstairs to the pool but it was closed because they couldn’t keep a lifeguard and had to hire more. Then the evidence collection team from the NYPD showed up. Apparently some agitated steroid freak moose went berserk or worse it was a robbery or both…. I tried to eavesdrop by getting on the nearest eliptical. Watching the screens alternate between images of MMA and Asian Pop Tarts grabbing themselves (which apparently is the hot new trend in music) it occurred to me.

Maybe this is a foreshadowing of Blade Runner, or Running Man – or HALO. Perhaps we’re waiting for the Brutes to show up and need the best of the best to keep the human race alive. The ones who can fight and fuck the best. It’s a Darwinian wake up call of Transformer like magnitude.

Brian McLane blogs regulary at brianmclane.com on media and popular culture topics.

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